I watched Bunny the Killer Thing (2015) so you don’t have to. I`m is also a professional water magician and the main specialist in the use of synonyms for words denoting the male genital organ, the female genital organ and the interaction between these organs.
Someone very smart said: “be afraid of your desires.” Not so long ago, I got excited about the idea of arranging a small interactive in order to celebrate the psychologically important threshold of one hundred noble subscribers for me. The idea was simple to the point of genius: I invited respected gentlemen to give me a film for review, which was selected using the highest number of likes on the comments with the name of the picture.
This action of unprecedented generosity did not cause a stir, but still there was a kind person who liked one of the comments. This man was a certain Caulfield. The same comment was written by Mokrushnik from the Black Rock. The film that ended up winning was The Rabbit Who Kills with His Twenty-First Finger.
Deep analytics of a movie we didn’t deserve.
Review Bunny the Killer Thing (2015)
Finland. Our days. A middle-aged writer arrives in a remote outback. In his deepest creative block, he hopes to rekindle his fading inspiration by spending the weekend rocking his sweetheart’s tent.
But the weekend is not set from the first minutes. The kidnappers kill the hero’s beloved woman, and he himself is taken to an underground laboratory, where a mad scientist injects a certain serum into the writer. Under the influence of a mysterious substance, the hero escapes from the laboratory and mutates, turning into a terrifying anthropomorphic rabbit, obsessed with only one thought – to make a sneeze-puff with his gosling. And it doesn’t matter with whom.
Meanwhile, a group of would-be hardcore rape victims travel to a country house to host an incendiary party and steam the bumps into the dirt. Picking up a couple of strangers along the way, they get to their destination. The party goes on as usual, young people enjoy the sin of youth. But the unlucky heroes do not yet know that the Rabbit is striving for them at the smell of fresh rags. A rabbit that kills with its morel.
Like many great films, “Killer Rabbit” did not appear out of nowhere. In 2011, a young director Jonas Makkonen shoots a short film of the same name for a couple of sandwiches , which tells about the misadventures, do not be surprised, of a rabbit that kills people with its jade rod. How it still hangs on YouTube is the mystery of the century, but you have a rare opportunity to see women’s naked boobies on YouTube, don’t lose your chance.
Like Neill Blomkamp with District 9 and Andrés Muschietti with Mama, Jonas also cherished the dream of turning his short film into a big film that could speak loudly about the young talent to the whole world. Possibly, but only possibly, the short is a little short of the work of Blomkamp and Muschietti, for it is 17 minutes of furry in its purest form. But who did it stop?
It is not known for certain how it happened, but Jonas had the opportunity to show himself. He dug up people somewhere, apparently brothers in genital interests, who were ready to give the young talent one million euros of the budget, so that Makkonen would realize his directorial ambitions with the proper resources. What for? How? Why? Unclear. However, in 2015, the “Killer Rabbit” or “Rabbit Killing with His Hook” is released, a full-length version of the short film that never fired.
Initially, I wanted to write a humorous retelling, not a full review. But in a strange way, there is something to tell about the film without going into humoresque. In an even weirder way, a humorous retelling would turn into a hardcore furry adult story, which is a bit out of my repertoire.
Like many, I learned about the “Rabbit” from the review of one respected blogger, and did not imagine that I myself would have to review this creation. Thanks Mokrushnik for this. However, “The Rabbit Who Kills with His Navel” turned out to be more interesting than I originally thought. Do not think this is not a brilliant film that turned out to be a victim of damned YouTubers, but there is something to tell here.
The first thing that surprises “Rabbit” is, suddenly, not the most shameful performance, as for something that at first glance is an unwatchable trash without five minutes. The film looks nice, the cameraman does not suffer from epileptic seizures, the make-up is of high quality, they even brought in graphics and respectable practical special effects. The film, purely visually, never evokes the feeling of trash made on the knee, which was a pleasant surprise. It is felt that the creators did not just want to make a blunder and in print, but downright make a real movie that someone might want to watch.
In addition to the visual facade, we also have an internal content. Thanks to the review of one respected blogger, I had a rough idea of what kind of flow of ringing vulgarity awaits me, but did not realize the scale of this flow. “The Rabbit Who Kills with His Seed Duct” is a film that seemed to be sponsored by a secret lobby of amateur theorists to stick a shaggy glass, consisting purely of fourteen-year-old puberty schoolchildren.
The amount of poop talk, copulations, solitary sexual pleasures, preparations for intercourse, and standing reels for an hour and a half of timing can shock the unprepared viewer. The scenes where the Rabbit belligerently turns his unit, implying an imminent death from sleep-sleep of the main characters, can only turn into a big shock. Being, in essence, an ordinary slasher about preoccupied fools, “Rabbit” flavors the tired formula with an epic amount of shameful content. Here, literally all the characters want to start stinging as soon as possible, neither cold, nor sleep, nor a missing friend, nor an anthropomorphic rabbit with a naked leather sword chasing him, will stop them. Many of the scenes in the movie are the actual opening scenes from adult, only without the adult.
And what a pity that I cannot insert a single screenshot here as proof. By the way, the reason why the screenshots from the film are as boring as possible is precisely because for all the spectacular moments of the film I can get a banhammer if I dare to show them to you. So, take my word for it. Okay, I’ll show you one scene , but be careful. Sheriff, don’t bathe, please.
I can’t help but note the interesting visual experience that I had thanks to this film. The picture is wonderful, the operator is well done, I have already said this. And the operator is so well done that I can now brag to my friends that I saw the scene filmed from the position of a rabbit sticking out flying towards a violent biscuit. And I also saw a huge black saxophone beating the crap out of a minor villain. And the scene where the rabbit waves its pipe, as in “Bruno”, also left a mark on the soul. And here the Rabbit will be slaughtered at the end with his own personal belongings. And they will show a mutated rabbit bag. And a furry orgy. Yes, don’t be surprised. There are so many here.
It is very difficult to talk about the film without reference to shameful content, because it consists of 90 percent of it. Kinopoisk. But will the picture get better if you accept its rules of the game? I remember that not so long ago The Brothers from Grimsby came as a pleasant surprise for me, which I avoided for a long time precisely because of the film’s notoriety, as a spectacle that discredits good taste.
Unfortunately, The Rabbit Who Kills with His Own Mr. Johnson is a mediocre film, even if one accepts the film’s over the top ringingly vulgar content. I can only explain this opportunity by the inexperience of the director, part-time screenwriter, Jonas Makkonen. The picture has a typical problem of films that grew out of short films – the full meter simply stretches the original material. The film starts off briskly, but slows down very quickly, stretching the action with unnecessary secondary storylines and conversations for the sake of conversations. Because of this, the first hour of the picture looks pretty bland. Not downright boring, but somehow without a spark. I came here to watch trash, and they show me the Finnish “American Pie”. The only thing that prevents the film from turning off is the Rabbit, who flickers in the frame from time to time, injecting a dose of fun into the picture with his balun.
The most annoying thing is that at first the subplots imply audience interest, but the director could not finish them normally. Here the policemen go to the main characters. They’ve stuffed the car with guns and are getting ready to show Rabbit that their clubs will be bigger than a rabbit chisel. I, as a viewer, mentally prepare for the action scene with the police, because everything hints at this. But no – the police are very quickly drained for the sake of another joke about Penisual Lokhankin. But one of the main characters, a crazy fighting yandere, wants to rape her friend, with whom she hid from the Rabbit under the boat right during this stealth segment (yes). It would be possible to unscrew something interesting from this, but no – the Rabbit kills her before she even starts, and that’s it. Why was twenty minutes of timekeeping wasted on revealing a combat yandere? To buy time. And so it is with everything.
No better with humor. The film presents itself as an obviously humorous picture, but it was able to squeeze out only a couple of funny scenes, mainly related to the Rabbit. Everything else is chewing on the same theme of copulation, which implies a humorous context, but does not work, because the screenwriter McConan is not able to move further than showing the genitals and friendly intercourse in terms of humor. This is frustrating, primarily because the creators present their picture as a spectacle without taboos and brakes, respectively, and you expect something more from them than showing a naked standing fireman for the tenth time. Shock content tends to get boring quickly if you don’t approach it with imagination. And the local trash is limited strictly to the female shame and the male end, which at some point in the viewing begins to tire.
The funniest thing about “Rabbit” is the insignificant fact that the Rabbit himself is criminally small in the movie about the Rabbit. For three-quarters of the film, he flickers here and there, but the film seems to specifically concentrate on his future victims, without giving me what I actually sat down to watch the film for. It’s like in the great movie “Tire” the tire would ride somewhere behind the scenes for the entire movie, while we would watch the beginning to not the most outstanding adult.
A moderately dull first hour more or less pays off in the last thirty minutes, for which, apparently, “Rabbit” was started. By this point, the film finally brushes aside all secondary storylines and concentrates on the main one – the Rabbit killing people with his doodle. These half an hour in total and pull the picture out of the abyss of mediocrity. The film is finally starting to reclaim its title as a trash slasher, demonstrating some rather sophisticated methods of killing with a leather flute and raising the degree of fun. Heroes rush from the Rabbit, he kills them in a famous place – fun, provocatively, with humor. Just like the whole movie should have been.
For me, the main problem with “Rabbit” is that it turned out to be much more boring and less shocking than it implies. It’s not so bad that it’s good, it’s just a drunken trash to watch with friends. From a movie called, for a second, “A rabbit that kills with its self-black”, you subconsciously expect a much greater intensity of trash passions. I do not deny that my viewing of this kind of films could play a role here, but nonetheless. I was waiting for a real trash, a la “Atomic School”, and not a boring slasher with boobs and boobs. There are many, I do not argue, but a lot does not mean good. You get fed up with local high-end content very quickly, and besides it, there is not much to look at here. Although I will not argue, from such a number of pistrons on the screen, it naturally ripples in the eyes. I caught a real pipko-PTSD
Bottom line: “The Rabbit That Kills with His Ding Dong” is not a movie bad enough to be “guilty pleasure” and not good enough to be worth watching. The director tried to shoot a mischievous humorous trash about an anthropomorphic rabbit of stupid students, but it turned out to be just a boring slasher with an overwhelming amount of standing trunks of all shapes and sizes. Yes, a nicely filmed boring slasher, but who cares?
You can enjoy watching a picture only through the prism of trash reviews from YouTube, where you are shown a squeeze of all the most interesting. I expected much more from the movie, so I was disappointed with what I saw. Even so – I expected anything, but not that the film would be just “normal”. Some films born from the short film are better off staying in the short film.
What we liked:
- The idea itself is great.
- The design of the rabbit is interesting and with straight arms, as well as its protruding parts of the body.
- Technical performance at a good level, looks much nicer than fellow ward
- There are good jokes
- The last half hour is good, no sarcasm
- Khavyrka of the Rabbit-girl at the end of the film is my homage to the creators, the abomination is still
What did not like:
- You will not see such a number of ends in every adult films. Unfortunately, they stop having fun quickly. Although if you are a fan of big hoses, then the movie is a goldmine.
- Most of the humorous content in the film is not funny.
- The first hour is rather dull
- The picture promises more than it can deliver.
Rating for numbers lovers: 5 out of 10
Is it worth watching: No
Blogger: Disappointed and expected more.
That’s all. Take care of your furs, but don’t forget about piggy banks. If you read to the end, thank you for that. The film turned out to be far from what, apparently, you and I imagined it according to the Turl Cabot review, but what can you do.
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